


Don't You Dare Let Me Go

by givegoodfeeling



Category: Take That
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Crossover, M/M, Sexual Content, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-31
Updated: 2013-10-31
Packaged: 2017-12-31 02:24:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1026167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/givegoodfeeling/pseuds/givegoodfeeling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I just want someone different, someone who has that passion and the voice and the look…who knew it could be so hard?” </p><p>It's 2013 and singer Gary Barlow's third and final year of judging on the world-famous X Factor panel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't You Dare Let Me Go

**Author's Note:**

> An alternative universe where Take That and the wives don't exist. No harm intended and I make no money from this, etc etc., this was caused by stupid fantasies in my head. First time posting a story on here but will also crosspost it to LiveJournal. Thanks in advance!

It’s another depressing day in Manchester.

They’ve been there for the past week now, recording for The X Factor, and they still haven’t really found anyone ‘popstar worthy’. Gary had bragged to the other judges at how special Manchester was, but he’s been eating his words ever since the first act came on dressed as a banana.

Nicole nudges him from the side. “They’ll come along, don’t be so grumpy,” she says softly, but Gary still feels down from the lack of talent.

“I just want someone different, someone who has that passion and the voice and the look…who knew it could be so hard?” He grunts as a girl puts more powder on his face. Bloody television. He was kind of glad this was his last year.

“Okay, next act coming on now,” someone behind one of the dozen cameras yells, and they all put on their solemn expressions. A man walks through the door, wearing a flowered shirt, a brown waistcoat, and tight trousers. He weaves his fingers through his brunette hair. Gary smiles.

“Hiya, what’s your name?”

“My name’s Mark, Mark Owen.”

“Mark,” Gary mumbles, writing it down on his piece of paper. He looks back up into those warm eyes and smiles at the man’s cheeky grin. “And why are you here today?”

Mark puffs out a breath of air. “I s’pose I’m here to pursue my dreams, really. Don’t really want to be a banker forever.” He grins wider and Gary can’t help but blush. Nicole nudges him again. She can read him like a book.

“Alright, in your own time.”

Mark grabs his guitar from the side and starts strumming a few chords. Gary has a feeling in his bones that this guy is going to be good; he just hopes he lives up to Gary’s wishes.

And then he starts singing _Creep_ by Radiohead, and Gary’s heart hammers against his chest. Mark’s voice is sketchy but warm. It has a unique edge to it – at times it’s husky, and at times it’s the right pitch. Gary’s fallen in love.

The song comes to an end and Mark puts the guitar back bashfully. Gary makes a quick note and then clears his throat. “Mark, how old are you?”

It takes him a few seconds to answer. Gary can see his eyes darting between Sharon and Nicole, before he answers, “thirty eight.”

Gary must look as shocked as he is because Mark chuckles slightly. “I know, baby face and all.” He chuckles a bit more.

Gary zones out when the other three share their comments with him. Mark isn’t the best singer he’s ever heard, but there’s something about him that Gary really, really likes. He’s quirky and mysterious.

“G?”

Gary notices they’re all staring at him.

“Sorry. Yeah, Mark, I really enjoyed that. We need to get your pitching sorted out just a tiny bit, nothing major.” He looks at Mark’s twinkling eyes. “But yeah, I really like you.” The smile on Mark’s face can’t get any bigger, and he practically skips out of the room when he gets four yesses.

 Sharon and Louis both turn to him once the cameras are off.

“He was alright wasn’t he? I mean, I could really see him doing well in the overs category,” Louis adds. For once, he wasn’t talking out of his ass.

“Yeah, I liked his voice. Good style, he was adorable,” Sharon pipes in.

Gary merely nods and underlines Mark’s name on his paper.

\--------

He can’t stop thinking about Mark after that. Even when they’re in Birmingham for auditions, he keeps comparing the performances to Mark’s and it whittles down to him saying _no_ more than he says _yes_.

He wonders whether Mark has told his family. He might have told his wife. And if he has kids, they’d be ecstatic.

Gary’s never liked a contestant as much as Mark and it’s really bugging him. He shouldn’t have favourites, he shouldn’t, but the way Mark’s eyes lit up and that big smile with all the teeth just made Gary melt.

They’re having a break backstage and Gary gets this mental idea. He knows he shouldn’t do it, but the more he thinks about it, the more he wants to. He’ll regret it. But he does it anyway.

He grabs his phone from the dressing table and loads up Twitter. He disables his _connect_ feed because with three million followers it’s kind of hard to really see anything else otherwise.

There are about thirty Mark Owens in the Twitter directory but he scrolls down until he sees him. His picture is black and white and looks really professional, and he feels like melting again.

Scrolling down he sees lots of smiley faces in the texts. He has a fair few followers as well (of course, not as many as Gary’s), and he seems to be a decent bloke. He goes back to a few weeks ago when he put him through – the contestants sign a contract that they’re not allowed to put anything X Factor related onto media sites – and almost falls off of his chair when he reads one that simple says _Gary Barlow is the most attractive person on this earth :-)_.

“You alright?” Nicole jumps him from his thought and he quickly locks his phone, probably looking like he’d just watched porn.

“Yeah, fine,” he blurts out, fake smiling. When Nicole sidles away again he unlocks his phone and stares at the tweet.

He doesn’t know why that makes his heart tingle so much. He feels sick. He locks his phone again and shoves it in his pocket, ignoring the butterflies in his stomach as he mumbles to the others about ‘going to get some air’.

\--------

Gary’s visibly sweating at the audience audition shows, because he knows he’s going to see Mark again. 

He’s been thinking about what he’ll perform, and if he looks any different. Gary’s scared he’s going to be really awful, but he knows he’ll probably put him through anyway.

The judges haven’t got the slightest idea about his infatuation and he plans on keeping it that way. If this makes its way to the producers, or any signs of it are recorded with the cameras, his whole career could potentially be ruined.

The crowd behind him are shouting his name, and he gives them a little wave, because he loves to hear them scream. He’s getting more make up applied to his face, and one of the producers comes up to them and tells them that it’s Mark Owen next. Gary nearly falls off of his chair, and Nicole places her hand on his knee when he starts shaking.

And then he’s walking on, and everything else around Gary is blocked out, because it’s like an angel walking on to the stage. He’s wearing a skinny suit this time, and his brown hair is coifed back. He looks amazing.

They all look at Gary because he’s the one who’s meant to be speaking, but Nicole takes over. Gary thinks she realises the effect Mark has on her.

“Hi, sweetie, it’s nice to see you again,” Nicole says. Mark smiles widely at her. “Can you tell the audience a bit about yourself please?”

“Sure,” Mark agrees. “My name’s Mark Owen, I’m thirty-eight years old, and I’m a banker from Manchester.” A few people cheer.

“And what are you going to sing for us today?” Nicole continues.

Mark fiddles with his collar. “Um, _Radioactive_ by Imagine Dragons.”

Gary’s eyebrow rises. He likes that song.

Mark goes to get his guitar and plays the song in a lower octave. The judges hear a range in his voice that they didn’t get to hear in the room. It works really well, and the audience is on their feet by the end of it. He looks overwhelmed.

“Thank you very much, you’re awfully kind,” he mutters into the microphone but the screams mean that no one hears him.

“Mark, I think you’re great, and you have great potential. You’re a real recording artist and you’re amazing on the stage,” Louis states once the crowd have simmered down. Mark is beaming and Gary beams with him. His heart is beating a thousand times a minute.

“You’re just _so cute_ ,” Sharon comments, making Gary as well as Mark laugh. “ _Everyone_ is going to like you.”

Nicole looks down at her piece of paper. “I can’t believe you’re thirty-eight.” The audience laughs. “You have the face and energy of a twenty year old. You’re fantastic!”

Gary clears his throat. He can feel Mark looking at him. He eventually looks up and raises one of his eyebrows. “I just think you’re brilliant. You’re a true artist.”

Mark looks so astounded that Gary’s scared he might faint. When he sees the tears in his eyes, Gary knows he’s well and truly head over heels. “We’re gonna vote now.”

After they send Mark through, the judges are having a little break. Gary decides to go for a wander backstage (accompanied by some film crew) and announces that he’s going to find Mark.

He finds him around the back with Dermot O’Leary and turns pale when he notices Gary there. Dermot abruptly stops talking and steps aside.

“I don’t know why I came back here, mate, I was just so dumbfounded by your performance, but in a good way,” Gary blurts out, momentarily forgetting about the cameras. _Right. Professional._ He places his hand on Mark’s shoulder and gives it a squeeze.

“I don’t know what to say. That may be the best comment I’ve ever had, especially coming from you,” Mark whispers, his eyes not quite reaching Gary’s. Maybe he feels intimidated.

“Just so long as you know I’m rooting for you, no matter what happens in the competition, alright? Don’t give up, Marko.” He gives Mark’s shoulder another squeeze and pretends he can’t feel him tense up.

He can feel Mark watching him as he walks away, no doubt in shock that Gary Barlow has just come up and talked to him out of his own free will. Gary feels stupidly happy.

\-------- 

When the phone rings on Monday afternoon, he’s tempted to not pick it up. 

He knows who it is – the producer telling him what category he’s mentoring. He’s half hoping it’s the overs, and he’s half not. He’s got a twenty-five percent chance.

He hesitantly picks it up.

“Overs.”

He hangs up.

_Bollocks._

\--------

It isn’t until Bootcamp that Gary starts to get worried about his feelings for Mark. If he puts Mark through, those feelings are going to get a lot stronger, especially seeing as though they’ll be spending a lot of time together. Gary really doesn’t know what to do. 

The Bootcamp stage is a lot different compared to the past few years – the acts will perform and Gary picks six of them to sit on chairs at the side, and those acts will go through to judges’ houses.

Before the acts come on, the judges discuss their abilities and whom they personally think should go through.

“I mean, she has a lot of talent, big voice and all…but I’m not sure she connects with the audience.”

“I like him, I don’t like his voice as much as some of the others though.”

They get to Mark’s name. Gary stills and asks, “what do you think about him, then?”

“Not the strongest voice, but Gary you could really help him with that.”

_I bet._

“The audience seem to love him, he’s quirky and different, which is quite unusual for the overs category.”

“So you think I should put him through, lest he does a good performance today?”

The judges nod. Decision made, then.

\-------- 

Gary decides to host the judges’ houses stage at a place in New York. He sits on the private jet with his six other acts, but can’t stop looking at Mark as he mingles with the other contestants. 

He is well and truly fucked.

Sometimes he thinks about not putting Mark through to the live shows despite of his incredible singing ability, but he knows that would be wrong, and he would never want to let Mark down. But he knows during the next few weeks he may do something he’ll regret. He’s got to be so careful.

Mark hasn’t really said a lot to him when they’ve been on their own off-camera and Gary’s still afraid that he’s being a bit shy with him. But whilst he’s sipping his champagne in front of him, Gary starts to accumulate plans.

They arrive in New York and Gary tells them to do what tourists do during the day, but to make sure they’re on top form tomorrow. He notices Mark go off with one of the females. He feels a bit jealous.

In the evening, Gary trudges down to the bar around the corner that he always visits when he stays here. He sits down in his usual place and orders his usual drink, when –

“Gary?”

He turns around and Mark’s sitting at the bar on his own. He looks around and then looks sheepishly at Gary, hinting that he wants to join him but isn’t sure it’s allowed. Gary’s not really sure on the rules for this, but he pats the seat next to him anyway.

“Why are you here on your own?” Gary asks. Mark chuckles.

“Could say the same about you.”

 _Touché_.

“Are you having fun?” He steps past Mark’s comment and takes a sip of his wine.

“Yeah, New York is a beautiful city. I’ve always wanted to visit here.” His eyes are twinkling and he finally looks at Gary. “I can’t thank you enough. I really can’t.”

“Hey, don’t say that,” Gary shushes, his heart beat slowing down. “Thank you for sharing your amazing talent with me. You’ve really taught me a few things.”

Mark looks like someone’s slapped him. “Are you kidding?” he sputters, “you’ve taught me a lot more!”

They both laugh then. Gary doesn’t realise how close they’re sitting until their knees bang together.

“So, Mark,” he clears his throat. “We haven’t really had the chance to talk.”

Mark looks down sadly. “I know. I guess I’ve been a bit…shy?”

Gary nudges him. “Shy?”

“Yeah, I mean, I’m not used to this, and I was scared that you would only like my singing, not me as a person.” Gary feels like this conversation has turned a lot darker. He’s not sure if it’s because of the alcohol.

“Don’t be daft, from the minute you walked into that room in Manchester I could feel your friendliness and your passion.”

Mark looks at him, a glint in his eyes. He licks his lips. “Yeah?”

Gary stares at them. He really, really wants to kiss him. But he doesn’t. Instead, he downs his drink and stands up abruptly. “Do you want another drink?” 

Mark downs his as well and hands Gary the glass. “Vodka and coke. Don’t hold back on the vodka.”

Gary returns a few minutes later and hands Mark his drink. “Listen, I’ve never done this in my three years as a judge, and I’m not sure if it’s allowed, so if anyone asks anything about this, it didn’t happen.”

Mark smirks and nods. Gary’s starting to see a different side to him, and he’s not sure if that’s good or not.

“You can’t get me any more drinks then otherwise I won’t impress you tomorrow,” Mark snorts, taking a few gulps.

“You impress me anyway.”

Mark visibly freezes, the drink splashing against his closed mouth. Gary wishes there was something sharp near by so he could stab himself. He hopes Mark doesn’t take it the wrong way.

He eventually puts his glass down, licks his mouth to taste the vodka and leans closer to Gary. “Well that’s good to hear.”

Gary really likes this guy, but he’s not risking his career at this precise time, especially now they’re in public and everything has eyes. He leans back and stands up.

“I’m going to catch some beauty sleep – I’ll see you tomorrow. Good luck.”

He hears Mark comment vaguely on the beauty sleep bit, but he doesn’t pay attention. The alcohol is swimming around his head. He feels so torn.

\--------

Gary’s guest mentor is Robbie Williams, an old friend of his, who is also a solo artist. Robbie’s a lot better than he is at picking out the characters. 

“Is there anyone here you particularly have a liking to?” Rob asks just before the first act comes in. Gary nods slightly. “Alright,” he continues, “then I bet I’ll guess them before the end of the day.”

Mark’s the third or fourth act to come out. He’s wearing denim shorts and a stripy vest with a straw hat. Gary’s internally swooning.

“Hiya, Mark. Nervous?” Mark nods, his gaze darting between Robbie and Gary.

“Yeah. Singing for two of the greatest songwriters isn’t a walk in the park.” He grins and Gary can feel Robbie’s eyes on him.

“What you gonna sing?”

“ _Love Will Tear Us Apart_ by Joy Division.”

Once again, Mark makes the song his own. The tone for the song is very bleak originally, and in a low octave, but Mark varies it and makes it easier to listen to. He’s accompanied by just the bass notes on the keyboard as opposed to the five or six instruments in the original song. It sounds really good.

Gary loves the way Mark’s eyes close when he’s singing, and his eyebrows are raised. It’s like he relates to every song he sings. He really connects himself to it.

He thanks them both and walks off when he’s finished. Robbie looks at Gary.

“I can really see the passion in his eyes when he sings,” he notices. Gary hums in agreement. “He’d be really good at the live shows, I reckon. He can make any song his own. No matter what theme, I think he could nail it.”

Gary sighs. “That’s what I think too.”

Robbie looks at him and wrinkles his nose up. “I can sense a ‘but’ in there.” He pauses when Gary doesn’t reply. “What is it?”

Silence.

Rob gets it.

“You really like him, don’t ya?” he whispers. Gary looks up. The cameras are off – he hopes. He nods.

“Christ, Gaz.” Robbie runs a hand through his hair. “We’ll talk about this later.”

\--------

They have all the contestants’ photos on the table. It’s almost midnight and there are no cameras – just them two talking. 

“I just don’t know, Rob. Do I not put him through simply because I don’t want to fall in love with him? Because that’s selfish. Putting my thoughts aside, anyone can see he is ridiculously talented, and I can’t put that to waste.”

Gary feels like he has the devil on one shoulder and the angel on the other. Robbie is looking at the cards and biting his fingernail.

“I’m scared that if I put him through, I’ll do something I’ll regret, like hug him just that little bit too long, or stand too close to him, or look at him too much in interviews.” He bites on the end of his pen. “But if I don’t put him through, I think it’ll be a big mistake – he’s thirty-eight years old and the most talented man I have seen on this show. This is his time. I can’t screw it up for him.”

Robbie hums. He hasn’t said anything in a good ten minutes.

“Rob?”

He looks up at Gary, and shrugs.

“I know what you should do. You know what you should do. Let’s leave it at that.” He stands up and places a firm hand on Gary’s shoulder. “By the way, you owe me fifty quid.”

“What?” Gary is confused. “Why?”

“Because I guessed who you liked, and we betted. Remember?”

Gary grunts.

“Come on, sunshine, fifty quid is like a penny to you.”

Gary grunts again. Fucking Robbie.

\-------- 

He’s shitting it the next day when he has to tell the acts whether they’re through or whether they’re going home. He didn’t have a lot of sleep last night. He knows how much all of his acts want this, and there’s nothing he hates more than telling them they’re not good enough.

He’s also dreading it because he’s pretty sure Mark will cry. He doesn’t want that.

None of the acts can speak to each other, so they don’t know whom Gary’s put through. Gary has put through one of his contestants already. Next up is Mark.

He walks in wearing pale-grey shorts, a white vest and a darker-grey blazer over the top. He looks incredible. Gary’s heart pings.

“How are you?” he asks Mark as he joins him on the big white sofa on the balcony. Mark looks like he hasn’t slept.

“I’ve been better,” he admits, blinking furiously. “Didn’t get a lot of sleep. Nervous.”

Gary nods at the cameraman, who’s still rolling. Professionalism. Right. He can see Rob at the back of the film crew, eyeing him.

“Since you’ve come on this show I’ve loved every one of your performances, which is rare for me.” Gary looks into Mark’s eyes. Why does he feel like he’s breaking up with him? “You’re very talented and you can adapt to anything, which is what I like about you.” 

He leans in closer. “I just – I’m scared the audience every Saturday night won’t get you like I do.”

Mark’s head bows. Gary feels like crying already. “I’m sorry Mark – I’ve made a decision.” Mark’s head bows lower. He can literally _feel_ how much Mark wants this. He feels like shit.

“…I’m gonna put you through to the live shows.”

Mark looks up with wet eyes. “W-what? You’re joking?” he whispers. Gary looks as perplexed as he does and shakes his head, standing up. Mark follows and they embrace for a few seconds. Gary can sense that Mark would never let go, but they have to.

“Thank you so much,” Mark cries out, not holding back anymore and letting the tears fall out freely. Gary smiles and grips his shoulder. “You deserve it, mate,” he says, giving him another brief hug before he walks downstairs to get interviewed with Dermot. 

“Cut.”

Gary blows out a big sigh and Robbie rushes over.

“I thought you weren’t gonna do that,” he questions. Gary shakes his head.

“I wasn’t. But then I could feel how much he wants it, Rob. How many people can radiate want from their body?”

Robbie nods. He understands. He pats Gary on the shoulder as Gary flops down onto the sofa, ready to break the heart of the contestant that was going to have Mark’s place in the final three.

\-------- 

A few weeks later and Gary is watching the recorded episode from when they were at judges’ houses, mainly because he wants to see Mark’s reaction away from him.

He cries into Dermot’s shoulder and just thanks him over and over again, like he’s God. He explains that he’s tried the music industry for so many years now and has gotten nowhere, and now he finally feels good enough to be here.

Gary opens up Twitter on his phone and goes to Mark’s profile – he’s allowed to follow him now that he’s in his final three – and gasps at the amount of followers he has. Nothing short of forty thousand. Last time Gary checked it was a mere hundred. He feels so proud.

He goes to messages and selects direct message – _u’ve always been good enough. Don’t let other ppl tell u otherwise. X_

He presses send and waits until he gets a reply.

_You are the kindest man I know. Thank u for everything. Xx_

Gary smiles and turns his attention back to the television. He can do this. He can sweep his feelings under the carpet.

\--------

The first interview Gary has to do with his acts is daunting. They’ve all had a makeover and he hasn’t seen them in weeks. Today is the first day of rehearsals for the live shows. 

He thinks he stops breathing when Mark walks into the Daybreak dressing room. He’s wearing a really nice turquoise shirt, with navy skinny trousers and white Oxfords. His hair has been cut a bit so that his fringe comes just above his eye. He looks _phenomenal._

Gary makes a leap for him. “Mark. You look great.” Mark looks chuffed.

“I know – funny what a makeover can do, eh?” He nudges Gary’s shoulder and looks him up and down. “Hey, you don’t look too bad yourself.”

Gary grins. He’s really glad Mark’s come out of his shell with him now. He knows there’s going to be a lot of friendship between them in the next few weeks.

Mark opens his mouth and steps closer, as if he’s going to say something else.

“Gary, you’re up next, in two.”

He smiles sadly and walks out of the dressing room. Mark will have to wait till later.

\--------

“So, Gary, are you proud of your overs?” Lorraine Kelly says in her thick Scottish accent. Gary leans back against the sofa – he has Mark sitting next to him, and his two other acts are sitting in front of Mark.

“Very proud. I have a strong category this year. I’m excited.”

“What is it about each act that you like the most?”

 _God, where’s the list?_ Gary thinks.

“Adrienne is a fantastic singer. She knows how to hit every note and she’s so effortless.” Adrienne looks at Gary and gives him a big grin.

“Stefan’s voice is raw and edgy, like a proper rock God, you know? The girls will love him.” He winks at Stefan.

“And Mark is this unique little thing that can deliver any style of music.” He feels Mark’s knee slightly hit his. He jolts in his seat.

“And who gets the most attention?” Lorraine turns to the acts and the three look at each other. 

“Markie gets a lot of female attention,” Adrienne announces, and they all whoop whilst Mark looks like he wants to die from embarrassment.

Lorraine winks at him. Gary tries to laugh as well but he knows it sounds pathetic. He wraps his arm protectively around the back of the sofa, just behind Mark’s head.

“How’s that working out for you?”

Mark clears his throat and tries to lean back. His head hits Gary’s arm. “I mean, it’s alright…I don’t really know how to handle it at the moment, but I’m sure I’ll get used to it.” He grins and Lorraine ‘aww’s.

“You really are adorable. And that’s all we have time for. Catch X Factor this Saturday night at 8pm, where all twelve of the contestants will be performing live…”

Gary zones out as he’s dragged away from the sofa and into a black car. Now he’s got to actually mentor them and pick out songs for them. He wants to go back to bed and block out everything around him.

\--------

Mark gets kicked out within the second week of the competition. Gary feels like it’s his entire fault. He didn’t know whether the audience would like him, and he was right.

He and Mark put on a brave face on stage, but when the cameras are off Gary pulls him into his dressing room away from everything.

“I’m so sorry Mark,” he whispers, letting Mark collapse against his dark suit. “I am entirely to blame.”

“No you’re not,” Mark mumbles. “You did everything right. You told me what to do. You picked great songs. I just didn’t deliver.”

He places his arms around Mark’s small frame and kisses the top of his head. “Hey, I promise, this isn’t the end for you. I’m not letting you go.”

Mark looks up then, wet eyes glinting. He studies Gary’s face, his perfect eyebrows and his gorgeous face. He leans in and captures Gary’s lips with his own. Only briefly.

Gary pushes him back sternly. “We can’t do that.”

Mark looks really embarrassed. “I’m so sorry. I’ve wanted to do that for as long as I can remember. You never have to speak to me again, it’s alright.” Mark’s crying again as he scurries out of the door.

Gary adjusts himself in his trousers and bangs the wall hard with his fist

\-------- 

He knows this is where all the contestants go every Sunday night. He knows that he’s got to be really careful here. But he knows this place inside out. He reckons he’ll be okay.

The bouncer automatically lets him in to London’s most extravagant club. He immediately orders the strongest drink he can and throws a fifty down on the bar. He’s going to need it.

And then he weaves between the bodies on the dance floor, ducking behind people when he sees contestants from other categories. _They can’t know I’m here. It’ll be all over the press._

And then he sees him. He’s dancing wildly in the middle of the floor with some of the younger guys from the groups – and boy can he move. He’s nearly showing them up with his breakdancing. Everyone loves Mark – what went wrong?

Gary admires from a distance, drinking his drink and enjoying the atmosphere. He doesn’t know why he’s here or what his intentions are, but right now, he wants to revel in Mark’s happiness one last time.

The song finishes and they all clap each other. Mark must be out of his face because he turns around and starts dancing on his own – something even _Gary_ wouldn’t do. He decides to make his move.

He slides down the steps, his pulse racing, and he approaches Mark from behind. His body electrifies when he holds Mark’s hips and sways lightly. Mark leans back into him, completely unaware of whom it is. Part of Gary thinks _slut_ , but part of him is glad he hasn’t realised.

He grips his hips tighter and moves closer, so that his crotch is centimetres from Mark’s ass. His heartbeat matches the tempo of the song and he can’t feel anything except the blood pounding in his ears from how nervous he is.

And then Mark pushes backwards, pulling Gary’s hands tighter around him and leaning his head back. He still hasn’t opened his eyes.

So then Gary – already beyond the friendship barrier – decides to kiss his neck, just slightly. He can feel Mark groan and move his neck so that Gary has more access. He bites lightly and Mark gasps, his eyes suddenly opening to see who the perpetrator is. And when his eyes connect with Gary’s everything gets a lot more intense. Mark’s knees almost give way so Gary has to hold him up.

“Don’t cause any attention, alright?” Gary says into his ear. Mark nods. He’s shaking, but so is Gary.

Mark turns around again, letting the music take over, grinding his ass into Gary’s now very obvious erection.

“I told you I wasn’t letting you go,” Gary shouts into his ear over the music, and Mark throws his head back onto his shoulder. Every part of them is touching, and Gary is on _fire._ “I’ve wanted you for so, so long Mark. I can’t tell you how crazy you’ve driven me.”

He thrusts his hips into Mark and Mark pants against him. Gary wants skin on skin. He wants Mark to remember how amazing he is. He’s so horny he thinks he could take him on this dance floor right now.

“I’m going to get someone to pick you up and drop you at mine, alright?” He feels Mark nod against him. He strokes Mark’s chest, gets his hands up under his shirt.

And then he’s pushing Mark around to face him and kisses him softly. The music fades around them and it’s maybe one of the best kisses he’s ever had.

He regrettably pulls back. “Now go, and don’t say anything to anyone. Make sure you’re not seen doing anything stupid. I’ll see you in ten minutes.”

Mark’s gone. Gary’s never seen him move so fast. He collapses against the wall, his hand covering his face. This is happening. He didn’t think things would end up like this, but he’s so glad they have.

\--------

When Gary gets home twenty minutes later, Mark’s already in his house, walking up and down the hallway, staring at everything on the walls. In the light, he looks even more gorgeous. Gary suddenly feels very nervous.

Mark turns around when he hears the door close, and smiles at Gary sheepishly. They stare at each other for a few seconds before Gary steps towards him and kisses him again. He can’t get enough of Mark’s lips, his face, his _everything_.

“I’ve wanted this for so long, ever since I saw you at that room audition,” Gary whispers against his lips. He feels Mark nod. Gary can feel tears against his face. “Hey, why are you crying?” he kisses Mark’s tears away on his cheeks.

“Because over the last few weeks I’ve really connected to you, and I was worried I was just another contestant you would forget about…I’m just a bit overwhelmed I suppose.”

Gary wraps his arms around him. “I told you you’re special. I mean it. With every inch of my life.”

Mark smiles. “You’re amazing,” he whispers, and plants his lips on Gary’s again.

Gary pushes him backwards, until he’s at the stairs, and then he picks Mark up and wraps his legs around his waist. Mark giggles as Gary staggers up the long staircase. “I knew I should’ve gotten a lift installed,” Gary grunts when they get to the top.

He crowds Mark against the nearest wall and kisses him with nothing but tongue, groaning as their hips collide. He pulls him off the wall and pushes him into the room next to it, until they fall on the king sized bed. Gary looks at Mark underneath him. He looks so beautiful. “Is this okay? I mean, if we –”

Mark shuts him up with another kiss and scoots up the bed, so his head is at the headrest. He kicks his shoes off and lightly palms himself through his suit trousers. Gary moans.

“You gonna take your clothes off then, Mr Barlow?”

He feels self-conscious for all of three seconds, but his arousal takes over and he shrugs off his suit jacket and undoes his shoes. He pulls at his tie seductively, looking at Mark the entire time. Mark is still groping himself.

He unbuttons his plaid shirt slowly. Mark gulps. He pushes the shirt off and he grins when Mark eyes his toned body. “Yeah?” he asks smugly. Mark makes eye contact whilst he unbuttons the top button of his trousers. Oh yeah indeed.

Gary mimics him and undoes the flies of his own trousers, stepping out of them as they hit the floor. He climbs on the bed, his cock straining against the restricting cotton so much that it’s starting to hurt.

He grabs Mark’s face and kisses him everywhere, whilst muttering, “please, Mark.”

Mark groans. “I’ve heard you say that in my dreams, but I never thought I’d hear it in real life.” And then Mark’s ripping his blazer off, throwing it on the floor, and trying his best to undo his shirt with Gary gyrating on top of him.

He manages it, though, but the trousers are a bit more of a struggle. He eventually pulls Gary off long enough to throw them behind him, and then the only barrier between them now is their underwear.

_God, it feels good._

“Need you Mark,” Gary pants. He’s never been a beggar, but he knows how much Mark likes it. He kisses his way down Mark’s body, admiring the ink etched onto Mark’s hip, before pulling his underwear down and kissing the tip of his cock.

Mark’s hands immediately find Gary’s hair. Gary kisses his way down Mark’s cock before covering the tip with his mouth and going down on him.

Gary’s amazed at how quickly it’s taken for them to be comfortable in a sexual position, but Gary isn’t going to lie – he’s felt the sexual chemistry between them since New York, and he’s always had an irking that Mark fancied him.

He feels a tug on his head and Gary lets Mark’s cock slip out of his mouth. Mark pulls him up and kisses him again, muttering, “Fuck me,” against his lips.

“Are you sure?” Gary mutters back. He doesn’t know what he’ll do if Mark backs out of this.

Mark nods and kisses him again. “Want you to be mine.”

That’s all Gary needs as confirmation. He jumps off the bed to get the necessities, peels off his underwear and climbs back onto Mark seconds later. Mark’s staring at his cock. His mouth’s watering.

“Can I just –” And Mark’s grabbing his ass and pushing him up so that Gary’s knees are by his shoulders, his cock bobbing in front of Mark’s face.

Mark takes him in between his lips and Gary has to physically stop himself from coming.

When Mark’s nose hits Gary’s pelvis, he has to hold onto the headboard and push back, muttering, “Mark, please, need to be in you.”

Mark’s apologising but he soon shuts up when Gary scoots back down and lifts his legs up, pushing them back so his knees are by his ears. He spreads lube over his hole, and covers his cock in it, and he’s looking into Mark’s eyes but Mark keeps nodding.

He pushes in slowly until he’s all the way in. Mark’s looking up at the ceiling, blinking. Gary isn’t even sure if this is Mark’s first time or not. There’s still so much he doesn’t know about him.

“You can move,” Mark says. Gary stays put, stroking Mark’s thighs. He eventually climbs between his legs so that he can kiss him. His cheeks are wet. It hits him then.

This was Mark’s first time.

“Please, I want you,” Mark mutters, his hands grab Gary’s face, and who is he to deny him that?

He pulls out slowly and rocks his hips into him, letting Mark adjust to the feeling. He never wants to hurt Mark. He wants Mark to feel as good as he does.

Mark eventually relaxes around him, and makes appreciative noises when Gary speeds up slightly. Gary’s hands are hooked under Mark’s knees, pushing them back to get a better angle. Mark’s hands are smoothing over Gary’s face.

And then he hits that spot. Mark’s eyes open wide in shock, and his mouth opens and closes like a goldfish. A smirk appears on Gary’s face.

“O-o-oh my…”

Gary continues to thrust into him, pushing his legs back as far as he can, and going as fast as humanly possible. His hands are all over Mark, his legs, his face, his hair. He wants to remember this moment forever.

Mark grabs his cock and pumps himself in time to Gary’s vigorous movements. Gary knocks his hand away and does it himself. He’s never seen Mark in such a beautiful, vulnerable position before, and there’s nothing he loves more.

“Jesus, Gary, I’m gonna – oh my God...”

Mark’s coming all over Gary’s hand, and Gary slows down to watch the way Mark’s eyes flutter close and the way his cock throbs as it draws out every last rope of come. He hopes it’s not the last time he sees this. Mark slowly and shakily lowers his legs to Gary’s hips.

Gary kisses Mark’s shoulder and continues fucking him, placing his elbows near Mark’s head and moaning out his name as he comes deep into him. Gary’s groan is so loud he’s sure he’s woken the neighbours.

He collapses on top of Mark for a few minutes, just listening to their heartbeats and Mark’s shallow breathing. He gets up to get some water and some tissues and to freshen up. By the time he returns, Mark’s curled up fast asleep, his come drying on his own skin. Gary smiles.

\--------

Gary’s about to leave for the studio the following Saturday, preparing for the evening’s live show with his remaining acts.

Mark is sitting on his sofa in nothing but his underwear, singing under his breath whilst writing something down. Gary walks up to him and kisses him softly, looking into those green eyes.

“Hey. Thanks for sticking with me.”

Mark blushes and wraps his arms around Gary’s neck. “Don’t leave me, G, I’ll be lonely!”

Gary grins at his lover. “I’ve got to, babe. Plus I need to talk to the producers, see what our situation is. I don’t want to have to hide you away in my lair any longer.”

“But I like your lair,” Mark whines. Gary knows he’s scared and, truth is he’s scared too.

“I like you more.” Gary kisses his nose. “And this will be sorted out. I’ll ring you as soon as I can. And make sure you cook yourself something.” He turns around but remembers something. “Oh, and remember to watch me on television.”

Mark’s heart-felt laughter is the last thing he hears before he closes the door.

\--------


End file.
